Okay, so a few weeks ago, when it was snowing and icy and I couldn't get to the grocery store, I pigged out on all the stupid stuff that I was keeping in the house as "cheat" foods because I didn't have anything else in the house to eat.  Well NOT THIS TIME! 

We've been expecting harsh weather again, and here it is!  I've been stuck in the house all day, but instead of having junk food in the house, I went to the store last night and stocked up on healthy foods, in case I'm in the house for a couple days.  I got up today and had my usual breakfast of omelet, toast, and fruit (pineapple, this morning).  I will say that I was having a junk food craving in the afternoon, and had a couple pieces of peanut butter toast, but other than that, I've been so good all day (and really, peanut butter toast isn't all that bad.)  I worked out, had my Shakeology, and as I'm writing this I'm baking up some chicken for dinner. 

I feel like I'm really on track this month with my nutrition, and because of that, I'm having great workouts again, too.  I was getting worried that I wouldn't be able to get back the drive I had a few months ago.  But I'm committed and it's obvious in the conscious

So bottom line, from now on, if I want "cheat" foods, I'll just have to go to the store and get them.  I'm not keeping them in the house anymore.  Also, that gives me time to think about whether I REALLY WANT that MilkyWay, or if it's just a craving that will pass. 

Some habits are hard to break.  This is one that has always been an issue with me.  I'm not interesting enough....  I'm not good looking enough....  I'm not thin enough.... Whatever it is, I'm not good enough for it.  RIDICULOUS thoughts for a 36 year old woman to have.  The most recent thought that has been holding me back is that I'm not fit enough to REALLY do anything with my Beachbody business.  I mean, really, who wants to take advice about getting healthy from someone who is still overweight??

But that's not REALLY what being a motivational coach is all about.  It's not about the fittest person telling everyone all about how fit they are.  It's about being who you are.  It's about telling your story and sharing your troubles and weaknesses with people.  And it's about finding a way for them to find their way to a healthier lifestyle.  It's not about me, it's about THEM!

So, taking a small step in the right direction, I FINALLY started my own fitness group.  I'm starting with only a few people, but they sure are some great people!  And you've gotta start somewhere, right?  So I'm getting some good things done in my Beachbody business.  I should be done with my website soon (it's taken a little while because I was focusing too much of my time on it, so I took a little break from it).  I have my group.  I'm posting daily on Facebook and in Instagram.  I'm back on track with my workout plan and nutrition.  And now that I finally have a group of my own, I really feel like I'm building MY business, and not just tagging along with my coach.  I'm really doing it!

Instead of telling myself I'm not fit enough to help people, I'm telling myself that I'm a work in progress.  I'm positive.  I'm determined.  I'm committed.  And I'm ready to take charge of my life and my business!

This is usually my life:  Lose 25 pounds during the summer.  Fall comes, I keep working out, but I'm eating poorly.  Winter comes, I'm eating non-stop and sitting in front of the TV all day and drinking all night.  Spring comes, and I've gained 30 pounds.  June 1st comes, and BACK ON THE DIET!!!

If you'll notice, by the end of this cycle, I'm actually 5 pound HEAVIER than the year before.  This has been my process for the last, OH, 10 years or so??  Which really does add up, since over the past 10 years I've gained about 50 pounds.  This brought me to 206 lbs. last year.  That is a number that will be ingrained in my mind for the rest of my life.  The day I got of the scale and saw that number, I just stood and stared in the mirror, taking in everything I'd let myself become.  That's the number that changed my life, and ended this unhealthy cycle - FOREVER!
 
Last summer, I began with Les Mills Pump (which uses weight lifting), and I haven't been the same person since!  I lost 26 pounds in 90 Days...not too fast, not too slow - just right for a healthy process.  I trimmed down and gained a TON of muscle.  After Pump, I moved on to Les Mills Combat (which uses a lot of kickboxing moves).  By this time, it was getting into  winter, and I was afraid that I would start gaining weight again...but over the holiday season, I actually LOST 6 more pounds! 

On the left is a picture of me from January 6th of last year...after this  was taken, I actually gained 10 more pounds, but I refused to have my photo taken at that point. On the right...a pic I took after doing Les Mills Pump. I still have a long way to go, but I'm so proud of myself for how far I've come.  

January was a little rough for me...it was a bad month at work, and, going back to my habit of being an emotional eater, some old eating habits crept in.  And even though my workouts were being done, they were suffering because I wasn't  fueling my body in the right way.  But at the beginning of this month, I re-dedicated myself to the program.  I'm doing a hybrid I've made myself, of both Pump and Combat, and I'm feeling great again! 

In just a week, I'm back on track and starting to see results.  The great thing about losing weight in the right way and getting HEALTHY is that, if you fall off course a bit, it's so much easier to get back on track that  if you're starting over from scratch.  My goal is to lose 5 pounds this month.  If I can, I will be under 170 lbs for the first time in 5 years!  And that's before Spring is even here! 

I'm here to tell you, if I can do this, anyone can.  All you have to do is get up and get moving, and expect results in due time, not overnight.  If you need support, find a friend, find a great support group, or get into one of mine.  But DO IT - TODAY!   

**Find out more on Beachbody Challenge and support under the FREE COACHING option at the top of the page, or go to:

For most of my life, I've had feeling that I was meant to help others.  I wasn't necessarily made for a big life, or a family life, but I knew I wanted to help.  It's true, what they say - You can't change the world until you change yourself.  Even though I've always had the DESIRE to help others become better, I don't think I really knew HOW, until recently.

We're all meant for different roles in this life, and the true happiness comes when you find out what your role is.  I've gone through my life, trying to help where I could.  I've given money, and shelter to friends.  I've given shoulders to cry on, and laughter through tears.  In my last management role, I was tough, but fair, and I prided myself on being the person you could come to when you needed a wrong to be righted.  But lately, I haven't had that chance to be any of those things to anyone.  There has been a void in my life, and I've been looking for something to fill that void. 

Making myself better has afforded me a great opportunity.  By becoming a Beachbody motivational coach, I have the opportunity to pay it forward - to help people HELP THEMSELVES into a better life.  That is a wonderful feeling.  My hope is, that one day I will be able to make a living doing this.  I'm very new to this business, and I'm getting used to all the excuses people give, and all the NO's I'm getting when I offer my support.  It's frustrating to know that they are the same excuses I used to give myself for not being healthy.  It's like looking in a mirror at the old me.  But 20 NO's are worth that one YES, and every day someone makes the decision to be healthier in some way, it's a victory for me, and it fills me with the desire to do more.

I've finally taken the time to give to MYSELF first.  It's true what they say - that you change the world by changing yourself.  It feels nice to feel like I have a calling in life.  Some may say it's silly...that I'm just "selling workout stuff".  And those people just don't get it.  But I do.

YOU CAN QUOTE ME ON IT:  To find out who you are is amazing.  To find out why you're here is priceless.

Let me tell you, the workout I did today had WAY MORE BURPEES than anyone should ever have to do!  And if you don't know what a burpee is, google it and then do about 20 of them.  Then you'll know EXACTLY what I'm talking about! 

So, I sat down last week and really recommitted myself to my fitness.  I was definitely starting to slip, and I had to take a serious look at the road I was starting to go down.  It's so easy to get off course with goals.  That's why I think checking in with myself at the end of each month is really going to benefit me.  I'm getting some great workouts in this week and I'm back to eating like I'm supposed to.  Within just a few days, I'm sleeping better, being more productive with my time, and feeling great again!  Why do I ever slack off when being healthy feels so great??

If you're not working out...start.  It doesn't matter WHAT you do, just put the Doritos down and DO SOMETHING!

At work today, one of my co-workers came in, and she was crying.  I'm usually not one to pry, so I don't know what it was all about, but when I saw her, I tried to think of the last time I'd cried.  And not like, I'm watching Marley and Me, or like on Sunday, when the Broncos lost the Super Bowl by 35 points.  But the last time I REALLY cried?  I just couldn't remember.

This thought is so significant because there was a time in the not so distant past, when I cried almost every single day.  It pains me to think of myself that way, so unhappy - unhappy with my job, my relationships, and with the person looking back at me in the mirror.  And really, aren't those the big three?  If you can't find happiness in at least one of those areas of your life, what else is there? 

During this year, I'm going to talk a lot about what getting healthy has done for me.  When you begin to eat and do thing right things for your body, and it starts feeling the way it's designed to feel, you just feel like you can conquer anything.  I wasn't happy with ANYTHING in my life (with the exception of the fact that I have some of the MOST WONDERFUL friends in the world, of course!).  Even the good things that happened to me were always overshadowed by the all the darkness I had inside.

Getting healthy, for me, was the ultimate eye-opener - it truly saved my life.   How could I workout and feel great and eat right, and then turn around and be sad?  It just didn't add up.  And I knew that if I had all of this baggage still with me, I would never be able to stay healthy or accomplish any of my goals.  I had never been able to accomplish anything in the past, but I'm determined to change it all!!  To make a significant change, I had break some things that were tearing me apart - I had to"destroy the things that were destroying me".

A few years ago, I left a job that I loved, but that was no longer something I wanted to pursue, and found a job that I thought I would enjoy, but ended up just was NOT being a good fit for me.  I didn't enjoy it, and I really wasn't even trying to do my best work, which is simply out of character for me.  And after being somewhere I had loved working for so long, it was heartbreaking for me to be somewhere that I felt inadequate.  It came to the point where I was so upset most days that I would cry before I had to leave for work.  So, I had to get out of that job to save myself.  Now I'm back in the restaurant business for a while, and that's just fine with me.  For now, anyway....

My relationship with my mother has always been a torrid one. I'd mess up, she would yell, I would yell, and we wouldn't speak for months at a time.  When we were in the same room, you cut the tension in the air with a knife.  It's been like that with us for 15 years.  But I just do NOT have room for that sort of toxic feeling inside me, and one day, enough was enough.  I made a decision that I simply was NOT going to fight with her anymore.  It's not worth it and it gets us nowhere.  I am willing to say that we have a better relationship now than I can ever remember us having.  Other people in my life, however, were not so lucky.  There are some people that you can love with all your heart, but they are just no good for you.  So I had to leave some of them behind.  And I'm all the better for it.....

And as for the person I see in the mirror?? Well, it took me 36 years, but I'm finally starting to see just how great that lady is.  The examples I'm making are short and to the point, but don't think they were, or are, easy decisions.  When I left my job, I had nothing...no money and only some job applications turned in around town without any REAL promise of a job yet.  But it was what I had to do for me.  And my relationships are definitely an ongoing battle.  I am tempted to fall into old patterns with familiar people sometimes.  But I have to remind myself that the hardest decision is usually the right decision.

This yearI'm destroying the drama, the tears, and the frustration in my life and what I'm building to replace is going to be amazing! 

 

I must admit that my diet has not been the best this week.  This bad weather we've been having has keep me from going out too much, and I've been just eating whatever's hanging around, out of the freezer or fridge.  A lot of not-so-good calories have been consumed over the last 3 days, and I'm not proud of that at ALL.  I guess it really caught up to me today because I just felt so gross all day.  I barely got through my workout today, but I knew I had to do SOMETHING good for myself, so I powered through.

But, what I've learned on my journey in getting healthy is that, you just have to give yourself a break sometimes.  Just because I stumbled for a few days doesn't mean I'm not healthy anymore, or that I can't get right back to business tomorrow.  In the past, it would depress me so much when I "fell off the wagon" that I would just keep eating and eating...and all of a sudden my weight would be out of control....NO MORE!!

The great thing about being in a fitness group is that there is always someone who inspires me to get back up and do the right thing.  And my coach checks on me if she doesn't see me post regularly.  And usually if she's having to check on me, it's because I need to be checked on, because I'm doing things that I don't want to post, like eating junk, or not working out. I don't know how I ever tried to get healthy on my own.  Obviously, I DIDN'T get healthy on my own.  But with help, I'm doing it, and even though I've stumbled on my diet this week, it's not going to ruin me.  I'll be out and about again tomorrow, and my first stop will be the grocery store so I can stock up on my healthy food.  After the past few days, I think it'll be a while until I eat another frozen dinner or peanut butter sandwich. 

There are a few things I tell myself when I don't want to workout - I'm too busy.  I'm tired.  I have a headache.  I don't want to take another shower. I've already eaten crappy today, so what's the point?  I'm sad.  I'm mad.  I'm too big.  People are going to judge me.  I could go on, but you get the point....

Well, yesterday I started to really think about what I was going to need to do in order to reach as many people as I can with my Beachbody group.  And this Confucious quote seemed to be quite appropriate.  I can't expect big things to happen until I lay the groundwork.  Yes, I post on Facebook here and there, but I'm just not reaching enough people with that.  Instagram is a great venue, and so is Twitter, so I have to start getting better at posting in those two places. 

What I'm focusing on right now is getting a website up and running.  I have my Beachbody website, but I could also reach a lot of people if I had my own Health and Fitness site.  So I'm in the works of doing that, and I'll share the website when it's up and running.  Once I get the website up and running, I'll work on changing my Twitter and Instagram so that everything links together.  

I've been a little lost as to exactly where to start all this on the business end of things.  I know, above all else, I need to stick to MY health and fitness - practice what I preach - or all of this will be a practice in futility.  But as far as the actual business goes, now I have a focus and I'm ready to get started! 

This is absolutely, 100% true.  The only time you REALLY FAIL is when you STOP TRYING.  As is the purpose of this blog, I've really been taking a good look at my life lately.  And what I've found is that IN THE PAST, I have been a quitter.  I quit things when they become "inconvenient" for me.  I've given up exercise program after exercise program because "I don't have the time", or "there's something good on TV", or "I've already ruined my diet for the day, so why work out". 

In the last year, I have found that the more I work out, truly the happier I am.  I am able to deal with stressful situations with more patience, I'm more optimistic, and I really take the time to work through my problems rather than just toss them into the pile with the others.  The cloud of gloom and doom has been lifted from my life.  So why in the world would I not do everything in my power to feel like this everyday??  Well, I have....for the most part. But lately, I have been feeling myself slip again, and today is about getting back on track.  

I know that the winter months are always the hardest for me.  When it's cold outside, it's just easier to come home from work and bundle up on the sofa watching TV all night.  And it's easier to keep snuggled up in bed all day than it is to get up and get moving in the morning.  And since I slept all day, why not just grab something to eat on the to work?  Yup, we've all been there.  And that's fine, every once in a while...we all have our off days.  We just CANNOT make habit of this!  

I've cut off the workout excuses by making a promise to get up at 8 A.M. every day.  And I'm doing that (for the most part...sometimes it 9:00, but still good for me!)  But my eating needs to get under control.  Working out and then eating like crap is not going to get me anywhere.  I mean, it's better than eating like crap and NOT working out, but I have to fuel my body or I'm going to start feeling terrible again.  My workouts have been suffering, and I know what's next...dropping the workouts, too.  Well, NOT ON MY WATCH!!

You can always get back on track...you can always make a change.  You never fail until you quit.  No matter how slow you go, you're still lapping everyone on the couch...I know all of that.  Winter will not be the death of me!  I haven't gained back any of the weight that I lost last year.  That is a TRUE ACCOMPLISHMENT for me.  I think of last winter, when I plummeted up to 206 pounds - 10 pounds heavier than I had ever been in my life. There was no hope.  I was doomed....until, of course, I found Beachbody, and FELL IN LOVE WITH MY LIFE AGAIN!!

This year, I'm 30 pounds lighter, and I'm making positive changes everyday.  I fight every day for a better life.  I may be going slowly right now, but I'm never going to stop again!  I'm making the promise today to get back on track with my nutrition, and keep this train on track!

I also think it's time to run my own Beachbody Challenge group.  To TRULY make a real change, you need 90 days.  I fell in love with the BeachBody life during my 90 Day Challenge.  So I think that starting in mid-February, I'll start a 90 Day Group.  That will run me right up into the beginning of summer, so that will be perfect.  

Do anything you can to keep yourself on track with your fitness...it's the best thing you can ever do for YOU!